The American Idol public has voted and…
Michael Johns is out.
There’s always a shocker at this stage of the competition. Michael was this year’s version. A solid singer with no glaring flaws or distracting tattoos, Johns just gets up there and sings with passion and style. He’s got a good voice. He’s good looking. His rendition of “Dream On” was adequate, in this writer’s opinion. So why is he gone?
…of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these: “It might have been!”
Thank you, John Greenleaf Whittier.
Wait, that doesn’t rhyme unless you pronounce pen like peen and been like bean; or pen like pin and been like bin; or pen like pen and been like Ben. Hey, that’s my name! There are lots of possibilities. Some of us pronounce pen like pin and been like bean. Some of us pronounce pen like pin and been like Ben. Some of us pronounce pen like pen and been like bin. What is poetry, anyway? Haiku doesn’t rhyme. What the hell. Know what I’m sayin’. Sheeeiiiitttt! (That’s Ebonic for “Oh, darn!”)
Michael Johns gone
No stopping Mexican kid
Kristy Lee must stay.
I didn’t expect Johns to be in the final two, but in my thinking he was at least good enough for the final four, which I believe should have been David Archuleta, David Cook, and Carly Smithson, in addition to Johns.
However, who am I to make such a prediction when the American public votes the way they do? It is not up to me to set the standards. Each voter gets to vote his or her own mind, just as many times as their button-pushing fingers, their patience, and their persistence will allow.
So, one has to suspect that the demography of the voting population is substantially different from mine. They have to be a helluva lot younger, for one thing. Youth is a state of mind, you say, but try and keep up with current affairs in the music business! I find myself 5, 10, 15 years behind and the gap is widening. Perhaps the brain has a limited capacity for accommodating pop music as it ages or perhaps our clinging to our old favorites—damn old, at this point—limits the absorptive capacity for new additions. Or maybe a lot of what’s currently popular doesn’t suit us. Or maybe much of it is pure crap. We had pure crap back in my younger days, but none of it had to do with bitches, hoes, and cappin’ cops’ asses. (Remember “Surfer Bird” by the Trashmen? That was the 60s. How about the 50s? “Purple People Eater”? But I digress…)
We know one thing: David Archuleta is destined to prevail in this competition unless he fatally alienates his fan base, which is highly unlikely. It appears to this Turkey that David Cook and Carly Smithson with any hope of offering him a serious challenge, but I have to believe that those hopes are slim. However, anything can happen. I have proved regularly by my off-base predictions here that I don’t know what the hell I’m doing and I’m out of touch with the voters.
This week features Mariah Carey as “guest mentor.” In other words, she’s promoting her new album and her signature perfume. This is the blurb from the Idol web site:
After being a part of the highly successful Idol Gives Back show last week, international superstar Mariah Carey will be gracing the “Idol” stage once again this Wednesday (results night) to sing “Bye Bye,” the latest single from her new album, E=MC2.
So, Syesha Mercado and Carly Smithson will have good chances to show off their pipes this week. So will the backup singers. I think Brooke White can probably do well, too, if she picks the right Mariah song. So can David Archuleta. It remains to be seen whether Jason Castro and David Cook can adapt this kind of commercial crap to their style.
And Kristy Lee Cook—dear Kristy—what will you do for Daddy this week? Choose well, you long-legged, fresh-faced baby girl, and keep this old Turkey happy for yet another week!
Looking is all I can do about it at my age! (Right, Artificially Sweetened?)
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Tags: Mariah Carey, Michael Johns, Paula Abdul, Randy Jackson, Ryan Seacrest, Simon Cowell, Television
She’s doing it with the country twang.
She’s really loosened up on this show. I don’t think she’s as bad as I once did.
Wow! This did not suck!
People wrote her off too early.
Paula is OD’d on Xanax.
I don’t really agree with Simon. True, it’s wasn’t great but it wasn’t “whiney” either.
No, we need to look to Brooke for that
How old is Paula? She looks pretty good, especially when you compare her to Madonna who is not aging well despite her three hour daily workouts. Someone needed to tell the former virgin that too much plastic surgery is not a good thing.
Yeah, Melanie Griffith, too.
Paula is 46.
Ditto on Melanie Griffith.
Right off the bat, this isn’t working for me. But this is not in any way his genre.
Man, this is really lame.
The tempo of this is just terrible. Even his dramatics can’t save it from sounding lumbering.
I does not really do much for me, but Jenny and I were having a discussion about Michelle Wong.
You have got to be kidding me, Randy.
Did I miss something? I thought it sucked.
Simon even liked it.
Jeepers.
Who is Michelle Wong?
I agree that the kid takes things and does them a different way and that’s good, but this one didn’t thrill me too much.
Jenny’s high school nemesis.
The subject arose when I made the observation, “What IS it about Chinks and violins????”
Hear that retching sound? It’s not Syesha.
I thought it was cellos.
Jason’s on last. Too bad for him.
Actually, I predict he may do something kind of cool.
All right folks. Get out the bong. Jason in da house.
Jason is very coffee house. Richie Havens would probably dig him.
Man he’s being drowned out by the damn strings.
I like this. It’s a heck of a lot better than all of the histrionics of the night.
Right on, bro.
It was a-ight. Nothing more. Check it out baby.
Good one, Randy!
Ditto, Paula–you go, girl!
Simon said it!
Tough shit. I agree with Randy.
Yes, the men are superior to the women in this competition, no question about it.
And that’s a bit ironic this evening since it was Diva Mariah’s night.
OK. We agree that Brooke has to go. Carly is next.
Brooke, Carly, Syesha. Pick any one of them and I’ll be happy.
Jason is a big fan of Seal.
Brooke and Carly–one of them will go this week.
I, on the other hand, am a big fan of Capybara.
Turkey, it was enjoyable as always.
Nice to meet you, Jenny!
Well, then…that’s wrap. Byebye Brooke. Night-night Patti. Ben out!