Well, one thing is for certain: American Idol will air its final show of the season tonight and I probably won’t get to see much of it. There’s a basketball game that garners more of my interest. However, it starts at 8:30, so I will be able to watch the first half hour of mindless hype. I’ll augment this with occasional look-ins, particularly at halftime, but otherwise, I’ll rely on the astute commentary of The Runnin’ Redhead to track the progress of our two Idol aspirants.
Not only is this latter day incarnation of Ted Mack’s Original Amateur Hour scheduled for two interminable hours, but also America’s Sweetheart, Ryan Seacrest, warned us last night that it would most assuredly run long. Those of you who stick with the whole thing to see which one of these two guys whose CDs I would never buy anyhow will win this thing deserve a medal from the Queen. Wait, that’s Adam Lambert. Well, fine, he and Kris Allen are both hoping that people actually watch this thing.
There’ll be B-list entertainers, there’ll be former Idols, there’ll be sardonic pranks played on people, and there will be aspirants who bombed out in the auditions brought back for more ridicule. Perhaps we’ll get to see the bikini babe again. We’ll certainly see the top-10 in the audience and perhaps on stage. Well, make that you’ll certainly see them. I’ll be watching King James decimate the Magic. There’ll be duets with famous B-list singers who have CDs to plug. Rumor has it that Cyndi Lauper will be singing with Adam. Whoop-de-doo!
In the end, all the hoopla leads up to the selection of this year’s Idol. Will it be Kris? Will it be Adam? In the end, it makes no difference. What’s hollow?
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New world record–nearly 100 million votes cast.
Dim the lights:
After nationwide vote…The winner is….
Sir Mouse was right!
Kris Allen.
Adam–you were robbed.
Mediocrity won, yet again.
Kris just said he feels Adam deserved to win. Ryan didn’t like him saying that and changed the subject.
Kris is stunned.
Adam is in good humor. He knew he might lose due to reason that will remain unnamed.
All the teeny booper, uh, I mean, bopper, girls are all so happy and all…ooooooooo, Kris with a “K,” we voted for you!
Oh Kris, I called in 785 times to “stuff the ballot” to help you win.
Adam, dude–you were robbed.
But I predict Adam will do just fine.
And that’s it for Season 2009 of American Idol.
Sir Mouse, I have enjoyed the festivities, as usual. Sorry you had to be elsewhere this evening but I understand–it’s the playoffs!
Find your spot under the couch and sleep well!
Until next January, dude!
G’night!
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