No, the groundhog didn’t see his shadow. You get six weeks for that, anyhow. The title refers to the fact that we’re getting down to the short strokes with American Idol’s eight season. This week, we eliminate Danny, and next week we watch the anticlimactic face-off between Kris and Adam, and guess who will win?
Or maybe not.
American Idol’s “voting public” has shown itself to be a fickle aggregation in the past. They tend to do irrational, childish things, because they tend to be irrational children. One year, like lemmings, they let themselves be led over the cliff by over-the-hill shock jock Howard Stern, voting for Sanjaya Malaker as a joke that kept his talentless ministrations on the screen for far too long. Another year, they dumped Jennifer Hudson, who has since won an Oscar. Somehow, they also managed to create “idols” like Ruben Studdard (over Clay Aiken), Taylor Hicks (over Katharine McPhee), and Jordin Sparks (over Blake Lewis). Who knows what goes through their minds?
I’ve caught a lot of chatter about people disliking Adam Lambert because he’s too cute, too feminine, too slick, whatever. If these nine-to-seventeen year-old voters get something in their mind, they could very well turn the tide of what seems to be an Adam Lambert juggernaut. I guess that’s a good reason to stick with it for the next two weeks, as otherwise, the conclusion is foregone.
Last week, little Allison Iraheta was eliminated. She kind of looked like an orangutan with dyed red hair, and seemed to be trying to perform material that was older than she. Don’t get me wrong — her voice, if not her looks, has potential. However, for now, it often appeared that we were watching a high school presentation. Many people said that the wrong person was eliminated. Oh, yeah? Well, who was the right person, wise guys?
See? I told you you were full of crap!
Tonight, we get to see Adam, Danny, and Kris in all their glory. If you want to know the truth, I wouldn’t pay good money to see any of them or to listen to their recordings. In fact, there are few among the seven past Idols I could actually say I’ve spent money on. I could count them on both hands (if I don’t count the individual fingers). Kelly Clarkson and Carrie Underwood. That’s it. It doesn’t matter, though. At this stage, they all can count on getting a recording contract for at least a couple of bucks. I have a feeling that Adam might piss a few people off with what he does tonight, so go ahead and watch. I’ll be there.
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The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Mouse in da house.
The Redhead says
The Redhead is early in the house!
So, Sir Mouse, why might Adam “piss a few people off with what he does tonight?” What is your inside info, hmmmm?
I’m of the same mind that the voters are fickle and anything could happen at this point (although I doubt Danny will be our next AI). Simon said this week he thinks Adam will win the competition. He should, sure, but will he?
See you in a few!
The Redhead says
You know, Sir Mouse, other than Adam, I can’t remember a weaker lineup a week out from the finale, or a less anticipated finale.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Adam should piss people off tonight. It is due.
The Redhead says
This type of song works well for Danny.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
LOL…you’ve been doing this three years. Funny how everybody says the same damn thing every year.
The Redhead says
What’s the theme tonight? I missed the announcement.
The Redhead says
I know but this year is worse than the previous two!
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
It’s “Going Home” week.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Kara is right. He can’t dance.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
The Eminee toy saxophone solo.
The Redhead says
Yo yo yo, dude. Dope, dude.
Ah, money spot, Kira. Too gyrating. Booooooooo from the audience.
Aw shucks, Paula. First she’s a pill addict, then she’s not, then she is, then she’s…
Desperate? Aw, Simon. Well, he didn’t like the sax. Wrong song choice he says. Whatever.
The Redhead says
Have you ever called and voted, Mouse?
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
I like Danny. If he wins this, I will dress just like him.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
I did that in Season Three because there were a couple of babes I really liked, but I was generally bored and Fantasia wasn’t one of the ones I liked.
The Redhead says
So, the judges are picking the songs?
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Dude it’s a big song…open for interpretation…a dark song.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
That’s one phase of Going Home week.
The Redhead says
Dude, bigbigbig.
Everybody knows the song? Hey, I don’t think I do. I’m just not with it anymore.
The Redhead says
Is Kris wearing a purple jacket or are those just the lights?
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
I think it’s gray.
The Redhead says
Blah. I was bored.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Unless he dyed his hair purple, too. Maybe he had Allison’s hairdresser.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Randy’s glasses look like they belong on a third grader.
The Redhead says
I agree with Kerra.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Give us the Italian hand gestures, Kara.
The Redhead says
But you noticed the glasses!
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
It was indeed boring.
The Redhead says
“There was a bum note there that was loud but I am so proud of you.”
LMAO!
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Simon’s got Paula’s makeup on his Hanes undershirt.
The Redhead says
Right on, Simon! Ooooo, Kira is pissed!
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Lalalalalala
The Redhead says
Kirra acts like she’s pissed but behind the scenes she and Simon are engaging in hot sex.
The Redhead says
Simon chose the song for Adam? This should be entertaining. I hope Adam takes it and makes it outrageous!
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
You have more spellings of Kara’s name than Preparation-H has assholes.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
I hope Simon sings it to Adam and they go to Maine and get married.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
It’s on.
The Redhead says
One by U2? I guess Simon wants Adam to stretch a bit.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Simon is just so cool. He talked personally to Bono about this.
Adam looks like a bonobo.
The Redhead says
Re: Prep H: FTW!
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
See, I told you he’d piss a few people off tonight.
The Redhead says
Okay, Simon is trying to appeal to the teenies and tweanies.
The Redhead says
Adam, I mean. Simon, Adam, what’s the diff?
(:
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
I can’t handle the fingernails and the tinny voice…and him sticking his tongue out. You don’t know where that tongue has been. See? He’s pissing me off.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
They’re damned if they stick to the melody and damned if they don’t.
The Redhead says
Dude, in the zone…Randy not diggin’ it so much.
Keera is impressed, dude.
Karea has some Simon hate going on!
The Redhead says
Maybe he got the sticking the tongue out bit from Mick the Jagger.
The Redhead says
And Mick has had his tongue in LOTS of places!
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
I think it’s a love-hate relationship between those two. After all, she was brought in to sort of balance him out.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Keighra, I mean.
The Redhead says
Hey, I think you’re spelling Kira’s name wrong 🙂
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Koorah.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
I want it to be football season. I’m tired of writing about this drivel!
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
At least I have hockey. Gonchar better be healthy for tomorrow night. They’ll need solid defense. The gloves will be off!
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
OK. Back to business.
The Redhead says
Say hello to Danny, Mouse.
The Redhead says
I tend to agree. This is the most boring AI I can remember.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
I think Danny can do Cocker.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Oh, shit…Danny can’t handle this song on key.
The Redhead says
I thought this would be a good song choice for Danny but I don’t like his version of the Joe Cocker tune.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Danny going home this week.
The Redhead says
He’s taken the grit out of the song and turned it into lightweight R and B.
The Redhead says
I bet the judges like it.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Not memorable.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
But Benna didn’t like the arrangement.
The Redhead says
Look at Paula’s teeth–so straight, so white. No one has teeth that are naturally that way.
I knew the judges would like it!
The Redhead says
I didn’t like the arrangement either. Still the judges all loved his singing.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Praise Jesus!
The Redhead says
Here’s more sameness by Kris.
The Redhead says
He’s got the girlie thing going for him.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Hmmmm….a Kenny Loggins sort of ring to it.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
This could get him into the final.
The Redhead says
Yawn.
The Redhead says
Never liked Kenny Loggins.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
This is his best to date. He actually put some soul into it. I liked it!
The Redhead says
I would choose Danny over Kris. Danny’s more interesting and has more energy. Everything Kris sings sounds the same.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Nope. Not I.
The Redhead says
It was okay. I’m just tired of him.
The Redhead says
Okay, come on out Adam and kick ass.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
It was much better than OK.
The Redhead says
Okay. It was good, damn good.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Oh, boy…Patti’s favorite…Stephen Tyler.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
He shoulda put on a striped shirt and big lips.
The Redhead says
Great song choice!
The Redhead says
The background singer is too loud. Shut up!
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
See, he’s pissing me off again with that tinny voice.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
I think he ought to have the sex change operation and get it over with.
The Redhead says
I like this!
The Redhead says
Take that, Stephen Tyler!
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Wait! I mean “gender reassignment” ….LOLOLOLOL
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Control the language, control the argument.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
I’m tired of ol’ Adam.
The Redhead says
Yes, this was better than “One.”
The Redhead says
Aw, you’re just being contrary.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
WTF — frequent flyer miles?
The Redhead says
I also agree with Simon.
The Redhead says
Paula has never come down from the Mile High Club.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
No, I can get tired of him after all these weeks. He’s going to win, don’t get me wrong. But I got tired of Boy George after fewer weeks.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Who’d she join the Mile High Club with?
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
OK…byebye Danny…Redhead will report to you readers tomorrow night as this Mouse is busy with GAME SEVEN of PENS-CAPS.
The Redhead says
BTW, have you seen Boy George lately? Not good.
Well, Sir Mouse, I will be in the house for tomorrow night’s farewell to Danny. Enjoy the game!
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Goodnight, Runnin’ Redhead!
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
You wanna show up for a hike on Friday? I have another marathoner, a friend of Mike’s.
The Redhead says
G’Night!
Win, Penn, Win!
The Redhead says
Very cool. Let me see how my toe is doing. I stubbed it badly the other night. Not broken but bruised and banged up. My doc says I have to wait a week before I run again.