The Nittany Turkey

Primarily about Penn State football, this is a tale told by idiots, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

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Home 2012 September Archives for 23rd

Archives for September 23, 2012

The Wild & Scenic Wekiva

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As I stated in my game recap this morning, I set out in my kayak with every intention of  catching the sunrise. That didn’t work out so well, because the rising sun hid behind the morning fog. What? All this pre-dawn fumbling around to wind up being foiled by Mother Nature? Harrumph!

Why can’t the Pittsburgh Steelers beat the Oakland Raiders, the crappiest team  in the NFL? But I digress, wistfully. Harrumph!

Turkeys
I encountered some of my relatives along the way.

I met some of my relatives along the river today (see picture), and all-in-all it was  a wonderful nine-mile paddle. I encountered many gators and turtles sunning themselves on logs, all kinds of birds, and only three other boats on the Whole Damn River (WDR). One was another old fart in a pretty red kayak. The other two were stink-boats. Harrumph!

One such stink-boat was a flat-bottom fisherman with a guy inside tossing a couple of lines out into the river. As I neared his boat (which wasn’t stinking, as it was stopped), a curious canine rose to attention with forepaws on gunwales. Very intimidating. Not. I dubbed the little Yorkie “Gator Bait.” Harrumph!

When I took out at Katie’s Landing, a Florida State Parks facility, the stink-boat guy turned up again, beaching his flat-bottom and loading it into the back of his pickup. I wonder what part of  the gigantically lettered sign “LAUNCHING OF MOTORIZED VEHICLES PROHIBITED” did he not understand. I bet that his fishing license is expired, too. Harrumph!

I SUCK AT KAYAKING (ISAK) RULE #1: Always make your outbound segment downstream, so you have to paddle your weary ass upstream against the current on the way back. Yeah, I know. We’re only talking 2-3 knots here, but a current is a current. Downstream, I can be totally lazy, with the only need for a paddle being for steering. Upstream, I’ve got to work, and some of those currents in the wild & scenic section of the lazy Wekiva are pretty tricky. (Yeah, like I’m having whitewater delusions here. Harrumph!)

Of course, the task manhandling a 14-foot boat onto the top of an SUV that is almost as tall as I am after paddling for nine miles and with a bad back to begin with, adds more pain to the fun! Harrumph!

Actually, I had a great time. Great solitude. Time for contemplation. The feeling that this scenery was what the native Timacuans saw here 800 years ago. No condos, no Ponce de Leon, no strip clubs, and no deficient public schools. They should have stayed in charge, but instead, the white man drove them to extinction, like their cousins, the Fakowie. Harrumph!

A paddle on a lazy flowing river is good for the soul. I’ll share my pictures with you, hoping that your soul appreciates them as much as mine appreciated the opportunity to take them.

The only thing that would have made the day more perfect (aside from the Steelers, harrumph!) was if Jenny could have been with me. Our days on the water are too rare. I miss singing “water songs” to each other from our respective kayaks, particularly “The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald.”

 

 

—TNT

Career Day for McGloin

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“I think we left a lot of points off the board.” —Bill O’Brien

Even though I fell asleep several times during the televised game coverage PSU’s victory over Temple, its results were satisfying in many different areas, not the least of which was evidence of the continued comeuppance of starting quarterback Matt McGloin. Most satisfying, the scoreboard reflected a fairly easy victory over an opponent that many pundits had opined was seriously ready to beat Penn State for the first time since World War II. The Lions, under McGloin’s stewardship, had no trouble dispatching the Hooters, 24-13.

The Nittany Lions (2-2) now prepare themselves for the B1G schedule after a doubt laden non-conference schedule that has fortunately trended in the right direction.

One thing that hasn’t trended in the right direction is attendance, which was announced at 93,680. I don’t know what the break-even point is for a game at Beaver Stadium, but it has to cost a helluva lot of money to run that barn. Fortunately, there are the TV rights, and this game got the full ESPN2/ABC reverse mirror treatment.

McGloin’s day should pump up his confidence going into the meat of the schedule. St. Matthew was 24/36 passing for 318 yards, a TD, and an INT that wasn’t his fault. He spread the ball around, too, finding nine receivers during the course of the easy win. On the ground, McGloin called his own number six times, scoring two touchdowns in the process, in one case carrying a couple of Hooters on his back.

And speaking of career days, our much maligned kicker, S-Fick, was perfect: three for three in extra points, and one 21-yard field goal that split the uprights more perfectly than Euclid’s bisection method.

Obviously, Penn State is nowhere near being out of the woods with respect to special teams, but it was good to see a smile on Ficken’s face for a change. The return game is anemic, the punting is short, and coverage can stand a major improvement. Yeah, they need work, but this was a confidence builder for the beleaguered Ficken.

Without Belton and Day, the ground attack should have been crippled, but senior fullback Michael Zordich has something to say about that. During the past two games, we’ve seen Zordich blossom into an all-purpose back. Although sophomore China shop bull Zach Zwinak took more snaps (18, for 94 yards), Zordich’s 15 for 75 gave him a career day. It was great fun watching the Lumbering Leviathan® chug forward in his style reminiscent of the old days of football. The vision that came to mind was Mike Alstott during his pro days at the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Both 6-1, Alstott’s playing weight was about 10 pounds heavier than Zordich, but they both play that pile-driving style. Zordich, like Alstott, can catch a pass from time to time just to mix things up. In today’s effort, the big guy caught four for 39 yards total, with the long one being a thing of behemoth beauty, a 27 yard scamper after the catch. (Wait, scamper doesn’t seem like the right word here, but I digress.)

The Nittany Lions doubled up on the Owls in first downs, and they looked much  better converting eight of fifteen third down tries. To have any chance of a successful B1G schedule, however, the third down performance will have to remain consistently good.

Penn State amassed close to 500 all-purpose yards while holding the Hooters (1-2) to only 237.

With nine penalties, it wasn’t a particularly clean game. There was a single turnover, an interception, that didn’t have to be, if Moseby-Felder could catch a football. Careful, kid, if you keep it up, you’re heading for the defensive secondary!

This Turkey must confess that he thought Matt Brown would be a bigger problem for the Lions than he turned out to be. The tiny titan (5’5″ – 165 lb) from Baltimore was almost a non-factor, with only four carries and twenty-six yards. He never managed to slip free as I thought he would.

And now, we face the B1G schedule, beginning with a couple of nooners, first at Illinois and then back home for NWU. This is where it gets interesting, folks, even if you think the Nittany Lions belong in the ACC.

Yak Layback
The Turkey conquers the mighty Wekiva River.

I got this outta the way early so I could load my mango colored kayak on the gas guzzling SUV and do some lazy human-powered paddling on a lazy human-powered river for a mosquitofull sunrise jaunt replete with alligators and contemplation of my navel. I’ll miss all of you. Don’t be jealous.

We’ll be back (if not eaten by an alligator) to give you a preview of the forthcoming rumble in Urbana against the Mighty Braves of Chief Illiniwek, who were just routed by the Louisiana Tech Bulldogs, 52-24. This should be a fun B1G start for the Nittany Lions.