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Home 2016 July Archives for 9th

Archives for July 9, 2016

Hibernation and Stuff

Posted on July 9, 2016 Written by The Nittany Turkey

Droughts and stuff

Those of you who know me well enough to have visited this blog over the years are aware that the post-football withdrawal period is marked by a severe writing drought for several months. The purpose of this post is to let you all know that I am still alive and still very interested in Penn State football as we approach the dog days of summer in Central Florida.

In my pre-retirement days, I seemed to find time for everything. Now, having been retired for five years, I have too many damn hobbies, volunteer opportunities, and other complexities not known to those who lead the structured life of the working world. I’m in a constant balancing act around here. Do I work on the kayak? Do I play with ham radio, which reqires almost no efforts to procure from places like sixofthebest.co/best-handheld-ham-radio-2019/? Do I go to the gun range? Do I fund raise for the American Heart Association? Do I fix crap in the house? Or do I lay on my ass and watch TV. Big prioritizing decisions abound.

I find other ways to waste time, such as buying more “stuff” so I have to deal with installing and maintaining it. More “stuff” means more time committed to “stuff” issues in general. If I buy new “stuff” to replace existing “stuff”, what do I do with the existing “stuff”? Sometimes it gets auctioned on eBay. Sometimes I stuff the “stuff” in a closet so I don’t have to clutter my mind thinking about its disposal. ???? ????? Sometimes a friend will be the unwitting benefactor of my laziness when I give them free, almost new “stuff”.

Back to sports stuff (for a while)

But I digress. Life in the Turkey sports world is pretty good. The Pirates are closing in on the Cubs, who started out with a bang but who we all know will fold as usual after the All-Star break. (Hell, they’ve already started their characteristic free-fall, having lost nine of their last ten games). ???? ????? The Penguins won the Stanley Cup, bringing great joy to the Turkey Coop. The Steelers appear poised for a good season if they can make the deal with LeVeon Bell. I don’t give a shit about the NBA, so you can stuff your Cavaliers, and soccer, oy vey! — that which they call “football” in Europe and South America suuuuuuuuuuuuuuucks! It ain’t an American sport. The Turkey ain’t interested.

Given all the displacement of proper thought patterns inherent in the foregoing, now must be the right time to be thinking about the Nittany Lions forthcoming 2016 season.

Hey, we also need to deal with side issues, such as how Hack will do with the Jets, and whether the lettermen will actually convince the PSU administration to restore the Paterno statue, assuming that PSU hasn’t sold it for scrap. And then, there’s the retooled offense, not to mention the offensive line that has nowhere to go but up. Will the Nittany Lions actually be competitive or will they disappoint us again? All I ask is for a good effort on the field, no pouting, and maybe a few more third-down conversions than have been the norm for the past three years.

I’ve only started thinking about all that, as I’m still trying to deal with the allocation of the time I’ll devote to PSU football blogging among my myriad non-productive activities. I’ll squeeze it in. I’ve been writing this drivel for 12 years now in blog form, and an additional 12 before that as a weekly email. It’s a part of me now, and it won’t be displaced by “stuff”.

We are… stuff!

Verily, my “stuff” runneth over, in this case synergistically with respect to the blog. I just bought a new keyboard and I wanted to let you know that I intend to use it sooner than later. The old keyboard began getting balky after having been subjected to the copious bullshit I wrote with it over its five-year life. It is now exhilarating to enjoy the crisp feel of wonderfully responsive Cherry MX Brown mechanical key switches responding accurately to my masterful keystrokes on this beautiful new DasKeyboard. To quote that slimy ShamWow TV pitchman, “It’s from Germany and you know they make great ‘stuff’!” However, the jury is still out on whether this fancy new keyboard will produce higher quality bullshit than the old Logitech. ????? ?????? ?????

Now I’m done rambling and I must get back to my “stuff”. I hope you are all having a great summer and are looking forward to the 2016 Lions. I’ll be back soon with some basically incorrect, albeit assailable, thoughts about the season ahead. I’ll give you a preview right now: it ain’t gonna be a 13-0 season with a championship trophy at the end of it! Anyone want to take the other side of that bet?

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Whodat Turkey?

The Nittany Turkey is a retired techno-geek who thinks he knows something about Penn State football and everything else in the world. If there's a topic, we have an opinion on it, and you know what "they" say about opinions! Most of what is posted here involves a heavy dose of hip-shooting conjecture, but unlike some other blogs, we don't represent it as fact. Read More…

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