The Nittany Turkey

Primarily about Penn State football, this is a tale told by idiots, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

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Ganja Three (Minus One) Charged

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Well, ol’ Maurice Evans and Abe Koroma were charged today with a semi-inconsequential misdemeanor, possession of a small quantity of marijuana. So, all that folderol by the cops and we have what amounts to what a whole shitload of college students do, only they’re not high-profile athletes in a program that is currently under a microscope. This Turkey still thinks that Evans and Koroma need some significant punishment from Paterno, not because of the gravity of the offense, but because they’re so irresponsible to the team and themselves, and besides, they’re dumbasses.

I read apologists’ reports around the ‘net saying that boys will be boys, etc., etc., ad nauseam. Screw that! Again, we’re not talking about Joe Student here; we’re talking about—dare I say?—hired hands. Yeah, that’s right. The payoff might be in futures, not present dollars, but it’s there and these guys need to be subjected to closer scrutiny and held to higher standards than real students for that precise reason. I don’t buy the “boys will be boys” crapola. It’s like saying that if players want to break training by disregarding rules and coming in overweight, that should be acceptable, too. ?????? ?????? ??? Look, these guys are playing for an NFL farm team, and it isn’t even a dirty little secret that they’re not real students. They’re privileged to be playing for a springboard program that will give them the visibility they need to make those big bucks at “the next level.” So, they better give us what we expect or they won’t get that eventual reward, which it seems many of them think is their automatic birthright.

Of course, the NFL will handle its disciplinary issues its own way. These morons better get used to being scrutinized for their behavior now, because if and when they reach the NFL, they’ll be 1,000 times more visible, especially because they’ll buy some 4-carat diamond earrings and 25 pounds of bling to hang around their oversized necks. (Why do they need to have big necks and fancy helmets? They have no brains to support and protect. Must be to keep the bling hanger in good working condition.) The thing is, as I’ve mentioned before, crap like this knocks their position down in the draft and costs them money almost immediately at “the next level.” Yet they’re stupid enough to do it anyway.

We all saw what happened to Ed Johnson. The NFL took a chance on him. He had the notorious “character flag” on his scouting report and he was passed over in the draft. Indianapolis decided to take a chance on him as an unsigned free agent. They essentially put him on probation. In his second year, he got himself arrested and now he’s out of the NFL. Yeah, another dumbass. Talk about cutting off one’s nose to spite one’s face!

Yeah, I understand. I’m already hearing ex-hippie potheads my age telling me that, “Like, man, smoking pot shouldn’t be a crime. Make love, not war. Fuck the draft.” All that 60s bullshit. Yeah, right. You know what? This ain’t Woodstock. It’s a business—a huge money business at that. I employ your ass, I make the rules. You don’t like my rules, you get the fuck out. If you want to stay, you play by my rules. I don’t give half a shit whether you think marijuana should be legalized. Screw your philosophical debates. These guys broke team rules and that has nothing to do with what should be legal and what shouldn’t be. If I hire your ass and I want to make a rule that says you wear red on Friday, then you better damn well wear red on Friday.

I’m just anticipating all the damn apologists. So sue my ass for rampant cynicism. ???? ??? ??????

Now, what would I recommend? I think that if these clowns are first-time offenders, which I believe them to be, they should be suspended for half the season—not just the cupcake part of the season. Make the rest of the team pay for their transgressions and send a very strong no tolerance message to those who would scoff at team rules in the future. They also should be told that the next offense will result in their expulsion from the program. Yeah, it’s harsh, but it doesn’t seem that people on this team have respect for the law and fear of the Lord. It might take them a while to realize that the effects of their stupid, ill-conceived actions will plague them long into the future, but somehow they need to start growing up. ???? ??????? Boys will be boys. Bullshit!

I don’t see Paterno keeping these guys out for the Illinois game and beyond. It will be interesting to see just how it goes.

I’m sick and tired of all this crap. I want Penn State to return to being a paragon of a program, the grand experiment, all that stuff. Alas, the program is as guilty as the players for succumbing to the pressure to have a football team that can play at the highest level. Coaches have to recruit brainless idiots who have no sense of proper decorum for an athlete representing a premier institution (ok, for a Land Grant school, anyway). So, the program is culpable from the President of the university on down. The fish stinks from the head.

If you don’t like the program being under a microscope where every little character flaw is exposed, tough shit. That’s the way it’s going to be, henceforth and forever. And stop the whining about Penn State getting more than its share of adverse publicity. That’s bullshit. It just always seems that way because you don’t read 114 newspapers every day about Colorado University—you read them about Penn State. Jeez! Quit your bitching and press for the punishments to keep coming down, and coming down heavy—just like the “No Fun League.” Fuck ’em—let’s clean this thing up!

Nittany Apartment Incident Update

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Here’s more on the incident reported very vaguely in the previous post.

The Centre Daily Times reports that the police responded to complaints of a loud party at #5204. I don’t see why that requires four units, including a “special response vehicle”; however, the university police said that they just happened to be driving the aforementioned SRV when they got the call.

OK, so no big deal—except that the cops also confiscated a small quantity of weed.

No arrests were made, the cops left with the confiscated evidence, and that was that. If any violations are to be cited, that will occur through the mail.

The boys couldn’t even roll themselves a fattie to pass around because the cops raided their stash. Pity.

Now, I can hear you Generation X and Y types who don’t know any better saying that smoking a little pot shouldn’t be a crime. However, these are athletes in training during an active season for their sport. They shouldn’t be using any drugs or alcohol. Furthermore, while I am not privy to team rules, I think it’s a good bet that smoking pot is prohibited.

Certainly, the ganja didn’t belong to Evans, Koroma, or Wallace. Some fool not on the football team undoubtedly left it there unbeknownst to the three innocent football players who live there. Yeah, right. Sounds a lot like Michael Irvin explaining away the coke allegedly left in his Dallas hotel room by a hooker a few years back.

There is something quite disconcerting about these dumbasses having even an ounce or two of marijuana (try from this resource from Missouri Green Team)in their apartment after all the attention that has been paid to off-field incidents involving their team. Christ, what is Paterno supposed to do now? Suspend half the defensive line? He can’t do that! He’ll have to let these guys off the hook, at least for the duration of the season. How will that go down with those who have been asking for Paterno’s head on a platter? No matter what he does, he’s screwed.

OK, I’m getting ahead of myself. They haven’t been charged with anything yet. I’m just sayin’. For those of you who are conspiracy theorists, perhaps Graham Spanier and Tim Curley planted that bag of mary jane in the apartment.

Oh, well. Business as usual.

Pair of PSU Players Party Precociously

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Police cite duo for underage drinking

With the Austin Scott caper hanging over the team’s head like the Sword of Damocles, the off-field shananigans continue. In this latest round of player transgressions, true freshmen Joe Suhey and Ryan Breen were cited for underage drinking in two separate incidents. These two had seen no playing time. Suhey is the son of a legendary Penn State fullback, Matt Suhey, who subsequently enjoyed a successful, 10-year career with the Chicago Bears.

What the hell is going on with this Penn State team this year? First the Scirrotto fracas, then Quarless and Harriott, then Austin Scott, and now these two. Taken individually, some of the incidents might seem minor, but in the aggregate they constitute evidence of an egregious problem. Once again, I am impelled to blame the transgressions on the dearth—or at least the vacuousness—of team leadership, which is to a large extent responsible for the Nittany Lions’ failures both on and off the field this season. A leaderless sports team is like a captainless ship. Someone needs to take charge, kick ass, take names, and do whatever else is necessary to coalesce these individual players into a homogeneous unit—a real team. Someone needs to establish some discipline and focus—both on and off the field! Freshmen—as well as those older players who act like freshmen, no matter what their class standing—need to be mentored by their more emotionally and intellectually mature peers. It is abundantly clear to this Turkey that the tri-captaincy of Connor, Golden, and Morelli does not provide that sort of leadership; thus, it is an abject failure.