The Nittany Turkey

Primarily about Penn State football, this is a tale told by idiots, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

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Some Quickies, Just Because

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Just because I received an inquiry as to why I was publicizing the blog of a whining woman who “doesn’t have a grip on much of anything” I feel the need to pass along some tidbits in more relevant subject areas. Hey, I was just helping a friend who has dog-sitting issues, but I digress. So here are some synopses of quasi-relevant stories that have crossed the Turkey Wire of late. (No whining women.)

Bowman and Baker are in deep shit, renewed felony charges pending. Yeah, reports say that they, among 15 PSU football players, were stomping a defenseless guy on the ground in that rumble at the HUB last October. CDT has the scoop. What was it? A week ago I said I was hoping for some feelgood stories in the off-season. Guess this sour taste will linger for a while.

JayPa is all full of himself with plans to implement the spread offense in 2008. Calling it the Spread HD, he’s not sure whether that means high-definition or heavy dud. Check out CDT once again.

An ESPN Radio rumor fodder tidbit involves Joe Paterno, who reportedly has been ill since the Alamo Bowl, voluntarily stepping down and being replaced by Jim Caldwell, currently quarterbacks and receivers coach under Tony Dungy for the NFL Indianapolis Colts. This makes for good buzzing for a few reasons, not the least of which is that Caldwell has a history with Penn State. The other relevant fact that was reported was that Joe is 81. Sheeeit, I didn’t know that, man! He even older than I is.

Recruiting season is in full swing, and I have nothing to say. Hell, who can keep track of all those high school kids? Once they get to Penn State, they’ll be fit into a system that is pretty creaky. The common wisdom for the past quarter century or so is that Penn State ruins quarterback recruits, so they look elsewhere. Kerry Collins was the one exception. His lengthy, albeit bumpy, NFL career attests to that. One decent quarterback in 25 years? No wonder Henne went to Michigan! The Nittany Lions can still get some pretty decent linebackers, though. It’s not that Paterno puts all the emphasis there, as some whiners suggest; it’s that linebackers want to play for Penn State—Linebacker U. The system conspires against PSU in other areas, from the soft Sandusky zone to the horizontal passing game. And then, of course, there’s the uncertainty of who will be the head coach when the current crop of recruits are seniors. (Be thankful I had nothing to say.)

Coach Galen Hall will be here in Central Florida in March for a cocktail reception. The Turkey will be there and will attempt to elicit some comments about the program. Or not. I’m not quite sure yet whether there will be a Q&A or any kind of open forum. The reception will be at the home of ex-Nittany Lion Mike McBath.

That is all for now. I’ve now tacitly atoned for posting the Playing With Fire stuff! It takes a whining woman every once in a while to see who is awake and reading out there. And here I was, wishing, hoping, and praying for a feelgood story that would shed a positive light on Dear Old State.

King to Go Pro. Happy or Sad?

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For the first time since LaVar Arrington opted for early entry to the NFL Draft in 2000, a Penn State player is bolting. That would be Justin King, he of the great, yet unfulfilled, expectations, who will formally declare his eligibility on Tuesday.

The so-called shutdown corner somehow made All-Big Ten in 2007, perhaps more on reputation than performance. He was notably absent on crucial plays during the season, particularly in the later games. Rumor had it that a shoulder injury was the cause, but this was never confirmed.

Will this be as devastating to the Penn State defense as many have proposed? In the sense that there will be one fewer cornerback on the roster than expected, yes. There is no depth at that position. Even if King was played at the level of Sargent or Wallace, his absence would be felt. Who will be the nickel back? I suppose time will tell whether guys like Harriott and Timmons can step up. Recruitment seems to have been lacking at this position. What this Turkey sees ahead is a bad year for the PSU secondary, and even worse years ahead.

Story at Fight On State.

College Football Withdrawal

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Sunset at St. George Island State ParkThe Turkey is back from a very nice few days up in the Panhandle of Florida, about 250 miles northwest of here as the turkey flies (but since this Turkey’s Jeep doesn’t fly, particularly across the Gulf of Mexico, it’s closer to 300 miles). I had one helluva good time hiking, backpacking, and Geocaching up there at Torreya and St. George Island state parks, not spending much time at all thinking about college football. (Normally, at this time of year I’m sucking up all the football I can get in preparation for the long drought.)

I returned home to suburban Orlando Sunday night, whereupon I received the following multi-pronged reality check:

  1. My fears about the Big Ten being outperformed in bowl games were borne out, with the exception being the pleasant surprise Michigan victory over Florida. All the other Big Ten bowl games went down as I had predicted. Draw your own conclusions. I did.
  2. How bout that Steelers-Jags game? Ben Roethlisberger sure knows how to throw INTs at the wrong time, and Mike Tomlin sure knows how to go for two at the wrong time. Maybe they’ll do better working on their golf game now.
  3. The uncharacteristically cold weather here in the Orlando area killed my showy hibiscus in the front yard. I have Al Gore to thank for not bringing his promised global warming. (Perhaps that’s why the global warming advocates are now trying to waffle by dubbing the nebulously unproven concept “climate change.”)
  4. The cream does indeed rise to the top in college bowl games and the NFL playoffs. Pretenders such as Hawaii, South Florida, and Ohio State in the college ranks, and Pittsburgh and Tampa Bay in the pros got what they deserved.
  5. Someone forgot to flush a toilet before we left for a few days. I will not describe the result.
  6. Chuck Norris is apparently running for VP on the Huckabee ticket. He was anything but “Missing in Action” in those victory poses at the Iowa Caucuses.
  7. Barack Obama is presumably having great success running for President with a platform of “I’m cute and well spoken and I ain’t Bush.” College girls are showing up in great numbers to vote for young, cute, and inexperienced. However, reason prevailed in New Hampshire, where the Republicans’ great white hope named Hillary edged out young and cute. We wish Mrs. Bubba well in the remaining primaries. The Turkey’s assessment? Populism is a sham, a political ploy to generate votes, and no iconoclasts or altruists are out there running for the top elected office—only those with blind ambition. Yet we voters continue to vote for the panaceas these guys and babes offer. Is it any wonder that someone running on a vacuous platform of “change” does so well? (It worked pretty well for Bubba, but I digress…)
  8. I managed to read in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette that Joe Paterno had said that son Jay should not get the PSU head coaching job when the senior Paterno retires. That’s either a stroke of reality or a master manipulation.
  9. The other blogs are done with their infernal year-end “Top 10” lists. Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition. You’ll see no such hackneyed, worn-out, unoriginal journalistic device here.
  10. I had to add a #10 to make this an infernal top ten list.

Mostly, I just wanted to let you know that I’m back and I’m ready to blow acrid smoke again. We Penn State fans could surely appreciate an uneventful and uplifting off-season, given all the crap that took place off the field last year. Alas, “uneventful” should not mean losing primo recruits to Notre Dame and USC, as has been reported elsewhere ad nauseam. Furthermore, the Nittany Nation continues to be constantly abuzz with lame-ass speculation about the coaching situation—who is leaving, who is staying, when will Joe go, etc. Like, give it a rest, already. Oh, and then there’s the quarterback controversy in the making, with the Clark/Devlin situation echoing Robinson/Morelli in Bizarro World fashion. It’s tempting to write about it, but no doubt it’ll be beaten to death elsewhere. Accordingly, I hope we will be able to find fresh, non-contrived, positive things to expound upon in the forthcoming months.

It’s going to be a long off-season. For now, I’ll sign off reiterating my wishes for a happy and healthy 2008 for all of you.