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Season Eight Idol Finalist Overview

Posted on March 7, 2009 Written by The Mouse Who Ate Xanax

With Nero fiddling in Washington, this Mouse turns to watching Rome burn. Being too disgusted by the corrupt institution there calling itself a congress, and a president who seems oblivious to what the country really needs, it’s time once again for this blog to crank up its American Idol bullshit! A little comic relief is in store, for a change.

We’re down to the final thirteen contestants. How the hell did it become thirteen? I thought it was supposed to be twelve. This year has been confusing to this Mouse. Humans seem to want to change things all the time. We mice just do four things: eat, sleep, get laid, and die. But we do them well. Humans, I guess, are more complex. They want to keep changing things. But I mousegress.

Thirteen finalists in this, the eighth season of American Idol, aspire to join the ranks of the motley crue [sic] of past winners. Let’s see if I can remember them all. Kelly Clarkson, Ruben Studdard, Carrie Underwood, Taylor Hicks, Jordin Sparks, David Cook (the guy with the built-in yarmulke) , and who else? That’s only six. Let me look it up. Oh, yeah. I missed Fantasia Barrino in Season 3. Never liked her.

Anyhow, the thirteen hopefuls this year are: Adam Lambert, Alexis Grace, Allison Iraheta, Anoop Desai, Danny Gokey, Jasmine Murray, Jorge Nuñez, Kris Allen, Lil Rounds, Matt Giraud, Megan Joy, Michael Sarver, and Scott MacIntyre. They range in age from 16 to 27. ??? ???? ?? ?????? There are five girls, seven boys, and one about whom I’m not completely sure. We even have a blind guy. Throw in an Indian, a Puerto Rican, and an oil rig roughneck, and you’ll conclude that the Idol folks certainly got an eclectic bunch together this year!

That one would be Adam Lambert, who somebody described as a cross between Freddie Mercury and Prince. Although that union might have been plausible, this mouse doubts that it would have produced any offspring.

We have four significant hotties this year, from this Mouse’s perspective. I knocked Allison out of contention for the favorite Season Eight hottie, not because she’s only 16, but because she ain’t my type.(Yeah, I know she is a redhead, but she doesn’t do anything for me.) I much prefer Alexis’ mousy look. Jasmine is only 16, but she has a winning smile. Lil is just plain sexy, but this Mouse is going to have a great deal of difficulty choosing between the two blondes: the aforementioned Alexis Grace and the superhot Megan Joy. Megan has tattoos all the way up her right arm straight to her damn shoulder. I objected to that last year with Amy Carlson, but it sure as hell looks good on Megan. The other blonde, Alexis, is a little girl with a huge voice. ???? ????? I would be surprised if she didn’t go very far this year (if she can stay on pitch).

Of the guys, I bet Adam goes the farthest. He is bound to be a teen and tween favorite because of his looks, and he handles himself well on stage. Jorge’s sincerity, spirit, and handsome smile will serve him well. There’s something for everybody in this rogues’ gallery. If you like blue collar types, Michael Sarver, who works on an oil rig, should make you happy. ???? ????? Scott MacIntyre is the blind guy—I have three relatives who live it his house (see how they run?) – and he can play and sing well. He’s developed a following through the auditions and elimination rounds.

So, we’re almost done with the long build-up. I hope we get down to the final eight quickly, so we can really start cooking. Of course, they are milking this thing as much as they can.

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Filed Under: Television Tagged With: American Idol, Megan is hot, so is Alexis

Which Stage Have We Reached?

Posted on February 11, 2009 Written by The Mouse Who Ate Xanax

I live under The Nittany Turkey’s sofa, and I watch his big screen TV, when I’m not eating the crumbs generated by his football parties. Just like the rest of you, I have lots of opinions.

I have kept my opinions inside for a while because I have been well fed—for a mouse, not unlike American voters, this is Priority Number One. Unlike lots of American voters, I work hard for my meager penance, and never expect that I will be fed just because I merely exist. Thus, if I had a vote—and someday elections might be crooked enough that mice get the right to vote—I would not vote for whoever offers me the biggest handout. I would vote for the long-term security and viability of the republic. But I digress. I need to spew a few of my musinations here, because football season is over, and I’m back to lean and mean again.

Let me give you a quote, which you may humanate over at your leisure.

A democracy cannot exist as a permanent form of government. It can only exist until the voters discover that they can vote themselves largesse from the public treasury. From that moment on, the majority always votes for the candidates promising the most benefits from the public treasury with the result that a democracy always collapses over loose fiscal policy, always followed by a dictatorship. The average age of the world’s greatest civilizations has been 200 years. These nations have progressed through this sequence: ‘From bondage to spiritual faith; From spiritual faith to great courage; From courage to liberty; From liberty to abundance; From abundance to selfishness; From selfishness to apathy; From apathy to dependence; From dependence back into bondage.

Lest you think I’ve been drinking the MUScatel and I invented these thoughts mouself, the quote is attributable to Lord Woodhouselee, Alexander Fraser Tytler,  a Scottish historian/professor who wrote several books in the late 1700s and early 1800s.

Think about that in our present context. Where do you think we are? Can anyone dispute the notion that fiscal policy has been loose, no matter which party has maintained control of Congress? Let’s look beyond partisanship to the greater good of this wonderfully abundant nation we’ve all enjoyed all our lives. Catering to a handout seeking majority is a sure path to ruin. Can we afford to ignore Tytler’s treatise?

Most likely, Tytler was discussing the progression of Athenian society, but I see similarities in Rome, too.

It would be short sighted and ignorant not to think about these words in our present situation. The voters have obviously discovered that they can vote themselves largess from the public treasury. No question about that. With only modest greasing of their palms, those voters can be maintained in the camp of those who would doom us to an oppressive future.

Those voters who do not easily fall into that category are now being subjected to the politics of fear: If you don’t go along with this huge, extravagant, pork-laden, so-called stimulus bill, we’ll all die broke tomorrow!

This society lacks the character to endure pain without falling apart at the seams. Thus, our politicians take the path of least resistance: borrowing money to pay off those who vote for them, knowing that these loans will have to be paid back with considerable interest long after they have feathered their personal nests. The voting public goes along with this scam, of course, because the alternative is onerous. We no longer seem to want to work hard and suffer pain for the sake of subsequent generations as our ancestors did; instead, we easily select the option of inducing pain and suffering on future generations so we can feel good today. We no longer view this as the land of opportunity where hard work can yield great fortunes; we view it as the land of handouts where slacking off is lavishly compensated at the expense of productivity.

To this mouse, this all seems ass-backward.


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Filed Under: General Tagged With: compensation limitations, economic stimulus, jobs as entitlements, productivity, selling out to government for me! me! me!

Paterno to Coach Rose Bowl from Booth

Posted on December 31, 2008 Written by The Nittany Turkey

Joe, stating that he doesn’t know whether he could handle four hours of standing on the sideline, announced that his plan is to coach the Rose Bowl from the booth. He also stated that he felt that his presence on the sideline would be a distraction.

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Filed Under: General Tagged With: anterior lateral incision, cemented implant, still game like a trouper, total hip arthroplasty

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The Nittany Turkey is a retired techno-geek who thinks he knows something about Penn State football and everything else in the world. If there's a topic, we have an opinion on it, and you know what "they" say about opinions! Most of what is posted here involves a heavy dose of hip-shooting conjecture, but unlike some other blogs, we don't represent it as fact. Read More…

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