I’ve been wrong all season about who will stay and who will leave American Idol, so I’ll just climb out on a limb and flat out state that Syesha Mercado will get the axe this week.
I was thinking that I had gleaned the intentions of America’s voters last week. Syesha has been a weekly low vote getter and now she’s isolated in the final four, where there are three high vote getters. (Very scientifically precise terminology, I know.) She should have no problem being eliminated this week no matter how well she does on the stage.
This week is Rock ‘n’ Roll Hall of Fame week, which means the producers couldn’t find a “guest mentor” who was cheap enough or who wanted to promote a new album. So, there will be performances tomorrow night by a couple of fill-in acts: former Idol Bo Bice and Maroon 5. Otherwise, contestants will get to choose songs from the most overplayed famous songs in the history of rock ‘n’ roll.
The Rock ‘n’ Roll Hall of Fame is in Cleveland, which means that we’ll probably get to see some “scenery” from The Mistake by the Lake. Big whoop!
This should be David Cook‘s night, being the premier rocker in the bunch. Look for another weak performance by Jason Castro. Those have come to be the norm for college dorm sing-along boy. David Archuleta, who can do no wrong by the pre-nubiles, will sing a couple of songs that will sound like every other song he has sung, and he’ll forget to obey Lord Lloyd-Weber about keeping his eyes open, yet he’ll get the most votes. Bringing up the rear (and it’s a mighty fine one), Syesha will sing her guts out but to no avail—her fan contingent is just too small, the demographic being males over 25, of which I think I’m the only one left. Alas, she’s gone before the first note is sung.
Sadly, Jason, who should have been gone weeks ago, threatens to become the Sanjaya of this year’s competition, and we’ll have to put up with him for yet another week. Then it will be down to the final two, which I hope will be Archuleta and Cook. But stranger things have happened. The folks who gave you Taylor Hicks might conspire to put Jason in the final.
Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that.
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Oh, yeah. Syesha is great in the platinum dress.
Randy’s shirt sucks.
Now we get to go to the Nation’s Armpit.
The Rockin’ Redhead has arrived!
David was born after Kurt Cobain died.
I think Duran Duran is a bit subdued for young David.
Hiya hotstuff!
Turkey, I don’t know about you, but if there’s one band of the 80s that I hate, it’s Duran Duran. I liked one song of theirs–Girls on Film–after that, it all sounded depressing and virually atonal.
David Cook is doing a good job with this, after all, he’s in his rock and roll element.
Yeah, he speeded it up and rocked it–better than the original!
But Roberto Duran was OK, except when he fought Sugar Ray Leonard.
Paula is putting the moves on David.
I disagree with Randy. I liked it a lot.
Yeah, Simon says!
I think we all agree. It was a-ight.
So what did you think, Turkey?
For Randy, “just OK” means that it was sung by someone other than Archuleta, for whom I think Randy has some secret desires.
Rock ‘n’ roll musical cell phone commercial was fine.
I like Cook, so I’m biased, but yes, I liked the song, and no, it was not his greatest performance.
Okay, I see that we all pretty much agree. That guitarist was rockin’ though.
I hesitate to predict who will go home tonight. I read your blog but I’m not so sure…I’ve been wrong on every show this season.
Well, so have I, but that doesn’t prevent me from having yet another bogus opinion.
Syesha gets hotter every week.
She doesn’t look as good in her Rosie Perez outfit.
But I love the Tina Turner outfit.
And just like Tina, she’s gonna start out slow and then “get rough.”
That was the wrong time to bring in the audience….she needs to build it up…like now.
Nice dance moves! She doesn’t have Turner’s energy but she’s doing a good job!
Unlike Tina, she is a soprano, not a barritone!
It was Tina’s arrangement, only an octave higher.
She’s also a cutie. She should have shortened the dress though.
How long can Simon maintain his patience with Paula tonight?
Just like last time, Simon’s putting the hocus pocus on Syesha.
Simon is a big poopoo.
He’s a flyzyzyzyzyzyzyzy.
Jason sucks.
Speaking of Paula, I’m pasting a portion of of this piece with “Nashville Star’ judge John Rich. He was pissed at Abdul, pissed at the whole show. This is a hilarious quote from him:
“’American Idol’ infuriates me as an artist,†Rich, of the multiplatinum country duo Big & Rich, said at an NBC press event in Pasadena, California. “They’re being fake about it. When you can’t make a cognizant comment about someone’s performance and you’re commenting on something that happened the day before, why don’t you just walk up onstage and slap them right across the face while you’re at it? As an artist, I would just flip them the bird and walk off the stage. … She wasn’t even paying attention to what was going on.â€
HAHA!
Flip em’ the bird, Sysesha!!! 🙂
News Update:
Obama takes N.C.
News Update:
Big Whoop
He’s gonna do the Bob Marley version. Fits the dreads. But I’m not diggin’ this.
I’m going to characterize this as another dorm amateur night performance.
Did you read the quote I pasted, Turkey?
This is pretty lame.
Boy, did that suck! 🙁
Now a glowing comment by Paula, as expected.
Kiss mah ass, Paula!!! 😛
Atrocious is a good word for it.
Randy didn’t dig it. Wow, I’ve never heard Randy be this negative!
And Paula? She didn’t really dig it either.
I don’t like that song either. Hated the Clapton version.
Simon lays it down.
Jason, dude, go have some ganja.
Totally amateurish.
Did you read that country dude’s quote?
Jason really needs to get voted off this week, but will he?
He was nowhere fucking close to the other two. And yes, I read it. Very funny.
This is a safe choice for Boring David. I wish he’d take a chance and rock.
This is thrilling the little girls.
And I predict the judges will dig it.
Stand By Me sounds like everything else he sings. And his eyes are closed.
I predict Simon will not be as high on it as the other judges though.
He belongs in Junior Mariachi Marching Band.
YOU PREDICT….HAHHAHHAHA
Oooh, he sang it to all the “beautiful girls.”
I’m telling you—Randy has a thing for Archuleta. I think he wants to do the pederasty number on him.
Paula is irrelevant. 😛 😛 😛
And how did you really feel Randy? 🙂
WAS he communicating with his eyes? I thought they were closed.
Simon speaks the truth.
Randy wore his orange guitar shirt tonight just to get David.
Is Randy gay?
I think Seacrest wants some Archuleta poontang, too, from the looks of it.
I notice that the judges don’t have to hold their comments until after the performers have sung twice tonight. Too much confusion for dear Paula!
I don’t know anything about Randy’s sexual preference. I only know that he digs Archuleta.
So there’ll be a double-date after the show. Randy and Archuleta; Paula and David Cook. 😀
I want David Cook to sing a hardass rock number next.
I wanna hear some rock and roll! I’m tired of this slow songs.
And I just have to say again, Clapton’s version of I Shot the Sheriff is one of the lamest “rock” tunes ever recorded. Clapton slept his way through it. He was great with Cream but ever since, the most overrated guitarist EVER. What a snoozefest. Technically there but no passion. I don’t get why so many think he’s God.
Why–
Artificially Sweetened?
Wow–Cook is taking a chance! This I gotta see.
I think I must have tuned into CSI:New York.
Okay, kick it out soon!
Why the hell is the audience clapping during the slow, tacit part?
This sucks. The tempo is way too slow.
He didn’t have enough time to make the most of that Who number.
I don’t get Artificially Sweetened, Turkey. Could you enlighten me?
He did fine with that one.
I did not like his version and disagree with everybody here.
My girlfriend’s blog responding pseudonym is Artificially Sweetened, inasmuch as she was a chemist with Nutrasweet.
That is what I like about you: you’re so disagreeable.
LOOK!!!! It’s Ashton Kutcher!!!!
I’m gay! I’m gay!
Can’t wait for Fox News at 10 to see the teen roller skating war!
I know they play Beethoven’s 9th at my Lowe’s, too.
I thought he Ashton dug Demi.
I think your girlfriend is authentically sweet!
Get Jason’s Marley number from iTunes!
Cool tune. She may do a good job with this.
Are we going to get the Whitney/Tina version of Sam Cooke?
I like the dress, but there’s no replacement for Sam Cooke.
If she is voted off and Jason stays, there is no justice.
Her version is not doing much for me though. She’s holding some of those notes too long and it’s not necessary.
Thumbs down.
Sam died in 1964, long before the birth of Syesha. But she did a job on this one…trying to save her ass another week. I hope she did!
Yeah…what Randy said.
Bring us back to earth, Simon.
Right on, Randy! We are on the same page.
Come on, Paula. Breathe in some reality. Pul-leeze.
Simon says but I don’t think so.
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
Well, she turned a great song into an opportunity to show off her acrobatic abilities vocally. I don’t doubt that she’s genuine in her emotion but she doesn’t get it. She doesn’t get that the drama is in the lyics and heartfelt emotion, not in vocally showing off what you can do.
It was better than what Randy said, but I can’t hear anybody but Sam Cooke doing it.
Now, we’re going to do Mr. Tambourine Man. He’s going to do it through the nose like Bobby Zimmerman, and forget the words, too.
GOODBYE JASON!!!!
He sounds like Arlo Guthrie doing Dylan. He just forgot the lyrics! Uh-oh.
If he can’t remember “jingle jangle morning” he’s in trouble.
Turkey, Jason is going home tomorrow!
Actually, the words are better enunciated—even the ones he forgot—than the way Bobby sang it.
Bye bye Jason. As Paula said, “it is what it is.”
So long!
I think it’s even money whether he or Syesha goes home—STILL!
I’m not risin’ to the Dylan bashing bait 🙂
Pre-teen girls are warming up their fingers.
I don’t need to bash Dylan. He never could sing; thus, he bashes himself.
Have you ever voted, Turkey?
But do you deny his songwriting gifts?
He’s like a poor man’s Willie Nelson.
Oh, I love some of his lines, like especially from The Times Are A-Changin.
And, of course, “the pump don’t work ’cause the vandal stole the handle.”
Yeah, b.s. you do.
Vandal TOOK the handle.
No, I actually do. “The loser now will be later to win…”
Dull David is back.
Uh-oh. The girls are going to be swooning.
This is actually a smart choice for him.
Oh, for fuck’s sake. Love Me Tender.
How the hell is he not going to evoke memories of Elvis and die in comparison? It’ll be like a poor Pat Boone version.
The retching is not needed in this song.
Yeah, that particular lyric is a favorite of mine, too. I think the took it from the bible.
Singing it like Whitney Houston, if you ask me!
The vandal took the handle in the bible?
Yeah, he’s not singing this with Presley’s tenderness or subtle passion.
Thumbs down.
Archuleta gets an IS rating for that, by the way.
Yeah, from the Sermon on the Mount.
Randy is looking for some junior ass.
David’s got these judges brainwashed.
That’s in “Y’all’s part of the bible.”
I liked Hungry like the Wolf. I guess I have no taste.
I thought Cook did the best.
Then Archuleta, then Syesha…..and Jason sucked far hind tit.
Yeah, but remember when he became “born again?” He pissed audiences off as he preached to them from the stage.
I shall be writing unkind words about Mr. Castro tonight.
Talk about “artifically sweetened!” That’s David A.
🙂
Gotta love Syesha’s latest outfits.
He’s an artificial weenie.
I’m hoping Jason gets the boot tomorrow…but I’m probably wrong based on what’s happened so far this season.
I’ll be here, Turkey!
So, like tomorrow night…be here!