The Nittany Turkey

Primarily about Penn State football, this is a tale told by idiots, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

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Chiefs Fans Petition to Keep LJ Benched

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Last week, we reported that ex-Nittany Lion Larry Johnson, Jr. was in a peck of trouble with the NFL Kansas City Chiefs for dissing his coach, insulting fans, and gay-bashing via Twitter. Johnson was told to stay away from team activities while his penance was being decided. Many speculated that this would be the end of Larry’s troublesome ride in Kansas City.

However, by week’s end, LJ’s agent had hammered out a deal with the Chiefs that would net Johnson what amounted to a paltry one-week suspension, after which he would remain with the team. On Monday, the settlement was announced. After losing a week’s pay, amounting to $315,000, and sitting out the November 8 game in Jacksonville, Larry will be back on active status.

This has pissed off many fans in Kansas City.

You see, LJ is only 75 yards from being the all-time leading rusher for the Chiefs, and a significant number of fans do not think that the pouting prima donna should hold such a lofty distinction in the Kansas City record book. In fact, they would prefer to expunge all memories of our Nittany embarrassment and let Priest Holmes hang onto the record until someone worthy (i.e., less of a damn troublemaker) comes along.

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Sports Illustrated Heisman Trophy Tour

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I was asked to pass this along to any of you who might be attending the big game on Saturday.

This weekend, the Sports Illustrated Heisman Trophy Tour presented by Nissan will be visiting the Penn State vs Ohio State game!
We’ll be setting up a huge tent with lots of activities for fans, including:

  • Opportunity to meet and get autographs from Penn State 1973 Heisman Trophy winner John Cappelletti as well as  Sports Illustrated Senior Writer Dan Patrick
  • Photo on the cover of a personal Sports Illustrated with the Heisman Trophy
  • Compete in one-on-one Heisman trivia challenges
  • Vote on favorite Heisman moment at Sports Illustrated Heisman Bracket Challenge
  • Check out the original “four-door sports car” – the 290-horsepower 2010 Maxima!
  • Check out features of every Heisman winner, facts and figures about the Heisman award and vintage photos and odd facts up around the tent.
  • Get a free copy of Sports Illustrated collector’s edition custom publication which celebrates 75 years of the Heisman Memorial Trophy.
  • Keep tabs on the weekend’s action by viewing other games and highlights on plasma TVs

The tent opens at 10am and we’ll be hosting activities up until the 3:30pm game. It will be located at East Halls at the intersection of Curtin Road and Bigler Road.

Lions Man Up after Three Sissified Quarters

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Remember the title of my pre-game post? To refresh your memory, it was Trap Games Are for Sissies. So, what happened on Saturday could have produced a really disgusting article from me here today, as the #12 Nittany Lions (8-1, 4-1 Big Ten) did indeed look like sphincterized sissies for three quarters until they redeemed themselves in the fourth quarter, eventually licking unranked Northwestern (5-4, 2-3 Big Ten)  34-13.

They came out with their heads somewhere else — entombed, perhaps, in a warm, dark, redolent intrapersonal space with a Vise Grip for a sphincter — as they allowed the Wildcats to dink their way down the field to a 10-3 lead in the second quarter. The touchdown scored by Northwestern represented only the second time a TD has been scored on Penn State in the first half this season — not coincidentally, the second in back-to-back road games in which the Lions suffered a slow start.

Then, something fortunate happened to the Nitty Kitties, albeit not of their own doing. NWU quarterback Mike Kafka, who with the help of his hurry-up, no huddle offense, was impressing this Turkey by hitting receivers in voids in the Nittany Lions’ vaunted BBDB soft pass defense, pulled up lame, grabbing his hamstring on one play and heading to the bench for the rest of the game after the succeeding play. Later, Wildcat sources confirmed that the injury was to Kafka’s lower leg, not the hamstring.

This game kicked off at 4:30, not noon, Eastern Time, so the guys didn’t even have the early kickoff excuse to fall back on as an explanation for their lameness in the first three quarters. I don’t want to take credit away from Kafka and head coach Pat Fitzgerald, though. I’m just sayin…

Who knows what would have happened had Kafka stayed in the game instead of being replaced by young sophomore Dan Persa at that point. Kafka had performed brilliantly, completing 14 of 18 passes for 128 yards, as his allegro molto rhythm had the PSU defense on its heels, attempting to extract their heads from the aforementioned warm place. Kafka also hurt Penn State with his legs, as he rushed 8 times for 42 yards and a touchdown. Persa was 14-23 for 115 yards for the rest of the game after relieving Kafka. He was also effective on the ground, gaining 42 yards on 14 carries with a long run of 25. He admitted that he was in over his head — it takes lots of real game experience to be able to think as quickly as Pat Fitzgerald’s bang-bang offense demands.

Penn State was able to add a touchdown on a 2-yard Daryll Clark scramble after Clark moved the ball down the field using mostly sideline routes to Derek Moye and Graham Zug. A pass interference call put the ball on the Northwestern 15, after which Clark hit freshman Curtis Drake, who was forced out of bounds on the 2, setting up DC’s score.

Northwestern closed out the half with a 45-yard Stefan Demos field goal, after an earlier, 37-yard effort had been blocked. The Wildcats took a three-point lead into the locker room.

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