This is the final week of American Idol for 2007, and I’m glad. Two contestants remain, Jordin and Blake, one of whom will be our next American Idol. This means that I won’t have this lame-ass stuff to write about anymore. Furthermore, I lament that there will be no more ongoing comment narrative between The Redhead and me about this show after this week for the remainder of the year. I think it is good that we’re not subjected to AI 52 weeks a year. I get more than my fill of their vacuous crap for the five months out of the year the damn thing is producing new material. But I digress.

The Redhead informs me that Paula Abdul broke her nose tripping over her Chihuahua named “Tulip.” The ever entertaining judges, superfluous at this stage of the competition, continue to provide twists and turns. Yeah, they’re part of the entertainment package. Paula will be lovely with her nose in a sling.

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Tonight is the penultimate “big night” on American Idol, for on stage three talented song stylists will be singing their hearts out to earn two finalist slots. Each contestant will sing three songs and for each, all three songs must be right on the money or the fickle voting public will cut off that contestant’s head with a carving knife. See how they run?

On the other hand, something other than pure singing performance might well govern this elimination. I said “fickle,” didn’t I? “The American People” have proven themselves to be replete with strange voting blocs not only in this year’s competition (viz., Sanjaya) but also in each of the prior years. Someone good always exits early. By the time they reach the cut from three to two, however, the wheat has been separated from the chaff musically, so other factors come to the fore.

That’s why we’ll be saying goodbye to Melinda Doolittle this week. Melinda is the most professionally polished of the remaining singers, but her cool, technical perfection will do her in. Though her songs are everything a vocal coach would want, Melinda does not connect with her audience. Her musical comeuppance was as a backup singer where she let someone else do the connecting while she did what she did best: singing. That’s still what she does best—better than the other two but not yet good enough for prime time.

The two survivors, Blake Lewis and Jordin Sparks, are the perfect duo for the final night of performances on May 22. They appeal to a similar demographic; thus, they will divide the voting public right down the middle. We really haven’t had that sort of a final since the great Bo vs. Carrie war of two years ago. I’ll withhold judgment regarding the eventual winner. Hell, I had picked Bo when Carrie won, so I don’t want to jinx anybody just yet.

Tonight, song selection will be of paramount importance. We have no guest mentor to restrict the choices to a particular genre. Accordingly, contestants can have no excuses if they choose unsuitable material. So, the key to success this week is: Pick good songs and sing the hell out of them!

After Tuesday night’s performance, we’re gettin’ down to the short strokes on American Idol and one of the big, early favorites to win the whole thing is teetering on the brink of elimination. With two weeks to go before the big final event, Lakisha looks pretty shaky. So does Blake, but I wrote yesterday that he and Jordin would be in the final and I’m going to continue to will them there. So, Lakisha must go.

Lakisha has two singing volumes: loud and louder. Give her a tender ballad and she can’t resist the urge to shout it from the choir loft like a standout gospel soloist singing Gabriel Come Get Me or something. This lack of versatility—her annoying sameness—will ultimately doom her, whether it be this week or next.

Blake came up with a couple of pretty weird renditions on Tuesday. The Redhead called them original. I call them crap. Novelty acts are fun for a while, but Blake needs to reel in his instinct to beatbox everything up—at least until acknowledged stardom gives him the right to establish “weird” as the new mainstream. He ain’t gonna get there if he keeps up the Robbie the Robot stuttering sound effects.

I’m enjoying Melinda’s singing less now, because I’m seeing through to her core. She thinks she can win this thing by being a coolly professional technician. I think differently. Absent a recognizable, edgy personality, Melinda might just fall short. She’s a singing computer up there. She programs herself flawlessly and hits all the right notes, with the right crescendos and diminuendos, the right phrasing, and all the right moves. Only one thing is missing: emotion.

And thus, I continue to support Jordin as my favorite to win the whole damn kit and kaboodle. She’s fresh, she’s young, and she can sing. Unlike Melinda, she has a personality. She occasionally stretches beyond her capabilities but, unlike Blake, she doesn’t take that all the way to the lunatic fringe. And most of all, she’s likeable—the most likeable of all the finalist candidates. Last, but not least, she’s big—if she wasn’t so sweet, I’d be hoping for her to pick up that midget, Ryan Seacrest, and toss him into the audience mosh pit.

Come to think of it, I really don’t care if Blake is in the final, just as long as Jordin makes it. I really like that girl.