The Nittany Turkey

Primarily about Penn State football, this is a tale told by idiots, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

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How Did I Miss That?

Posted on September 9, 2008 Written by The Mouse Who Ate Xanax

I can’t believe that I missed it! Presidential candidate Barack Obama, stumping in Pennsylvania last week, called the Penn State football team “The Nittley Lions”? While feigning being a college football fan to attempt to regain the votes his “clinging to their guns and religion” faux pas in San Francisco lost, he blew any hope of establishing credibility on the chosen subject. The only mystery is why didn’t I hear about it until it was mentioned by Tony Kornheiser and Mike Wilbon on Pardon the Interruption on Monday evening. How the hell could I have missed something this hilarious?

This Mouse thinks Senator Obama is running scared and is trying a little too hard to get the Pennsylvania working class vote. If he just would shut his mouth, he probably would get their vote, but if he keeps putting his foot in it, enough of them could become disgusted enough to make a difference. You and I know small town Pennsylvanians. Obama is on thin enough ice with them to begin with. He ought to stop pressing his luck.

I’m lovin’ every minute of it! Let Obama keep on revealing the faker he really is.

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Filed Under: General, Penn State Football Tagged With: 2008 Presidential Election, Barack Obama, clinging to their guns and religion, college football, Mr. Malaprop, Nittany Lions, Nittley Lions, Penn State, Penn State Football, Sports

Heidi Revisited?

Posted on September 8, 2008 Written by The Nittany Turkey

Forty years have elapsed since the infamous “Heidi Game,” which means that most of you readers will have absolutely no clue as to what I am talking about. The game, played on November 17, 1968, was an important AFL match up between the New York Jets and the Oakland Raiders, with both teams being at the peak of their all-time popularity and both sporting a 7-2 record for the season. It was a smash-mouth battle involving the two great arms of the time as the opposing quarterbacks, Joe Namath and Darryl Lamonica. As the exciting game ground to completion, with 65 seconds left in the game, the Jets led the defending champion Raiders 32-29.

NBC was broadcasting the game nationwide, and thought the game was decided. They had scheduled a broadcast of the children’s story Heidi at that time, so they pulled the plug on the football game, evoking justifiable ire and outrage among the viewing audience. Even if no more scoring was to take place, the fans deserved to see the end of the game, but there was more scoring. Lots more. In one of the greatest comebacks in professional football history, the Raiders scored 14 points in the final 65 seconds, winning the game 43-32. America suddenly had a new enemy, and it wasn’t the North Vietnamese—it was NBC.

The ensuing furious response actually broke the NBC switchboard the next morning.

What the hell does this have to do with anything in 2008? Well, we have a new enemy, and it is not Al Qaeda—it is ESPN/ABC.

The Disney-owned entertainment conglomerate chose to cut away from the Penn State-Oregon State game with practically a whole quarter remaining. Penn State was leading 45-7 at the time. Sure, it seemed like the Nittany Lions had the game well in hand, but being Penn State fans, we wanted to see Pat Devlin and some of the clean jerseys in action. From ABC’s perspective, it was a blowout, it was the primary national game on ABC for most of the country, and no doubt a lot of advertising revenue was at stake if viewers tuned out. In the Turkey’s Cave, we scrambled, looking around the satellite channels and not finding anything. There ensued a mad dash to get computers set up to listen to Steve Smith and Jack Ham doing the radio broadcast, which took a while and was distracting as hell. By that time it was 45-14, which would turn out to be the final score. We completely missed Jerome Hayes’ injury, which we had to read about in the morning news.

I can only imagine that the various viewing parties around the country were scenes of bemused chaos. ABC/ESPN protected their revenue, but what about people who walked out of bars around the country an hour or so earlier than they would have if the game were carried to completion? Doesn’t Disney have some responsibility to those small businesses and to the ordinary viewer? Or is it all about commercial revenue?

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Filed Under: Penn State Football, Television Tagged With: ABC/ESPN, college football, Heidi, network television, Penn State Football, Sports, Walt Disney Company

The Barracuda is a Tough Act to Follow

Posted on September 5, 2008 Written by The Mouse Who Ate Xanax

This convention weary Mouse eschewed the season opening NFL game tonight in order to view the final night of the Republican National Convention. I later found out that the New York Giants had defeated the Washington Redskins, 16-7.

In any event, tonight was a night that will be largely forgotten in the long run; whereas last night will linger in our memories for a long, long time. The Barracuda is a tough act to follow, rendering tonight anticlimactic.

There were more pedestrian speeches, nothing special. However, it is worth noting that Cindy McCain carried herself well on stage for this being the first time she’s faced a major audience. Once she was done, it was time for the McCain acceptance speech.

McCain is not a charismatic speaker. Expectations were low, although the audience on the floor seemed to be hoping for some fire and brimstone, which they really never got. Furthermore, McCain speaks best to an engaged audience in a town hall atmosphere. The Teleprompter is a hostile environment for him.

The speech started off slowly and stiffly, as McCain worked through the basic cordialities, thanking family, party, the troops, and “my friends” for making it possible for him to be standing there. It is interesting to note that in this section of the speech, McCain paid tribute to President George W. Bush with a one-sentence passing mention recognizing Bush for leading us after 9/11. That was it, the last direct reference to Bush, although later on, McCain would indict the present cast of characters in Washington for losing touch.

Appealing to the conservative wing, he asserted that “we [meaning Republicans] lost [the people’s] trust. We’re going to change that. The party of Lincoln, Roosevelt, and Reagan is going to get back to basics.”

McCain portryed himself as a fighter who proudly wears the “maverick” moniker. He emphasized country before party. In doing so he set the stage for enunciating his differences with not only his opponent, Barack Obama, but also his own party and “business as usual” in Washington.

He ran through a series of core issues, contrasting his approach with those of his opponent. One of the first subjects was education, which McCain described as “the civil rights issue of this century.” He said that equal access had been gained but then he asked, “What is the value of access to a failing school?” He would create competition, empower parents with choice, remove barriers to recruiting new instructors, reward good teachers and send bad teachers packing. To sum it up, he said, “Obama wants schools to answer to unions and bureaucrats; we want schools to answer to parents and students.”

If rhetoric could kill, the National Education Association would be dead and buried tonight. Alas, it will be a helluva lot of work to free our broken education system from the shackles of malevolent, self-interested unionism.

McCain stressed individual responsibility and initiative, with minimal governmental intervention, instead of expansive government programs. Tax reductions instead of massive tax increases, health care reform that will allow individual choice instead of having “a bureaucrat standing between you and your doctor,” opening markets and preparing workers for new, permanent jobs, and attacking the energy problems on every front.

He would drill new wells offshore and drill them now, encourage construction of safe nuclear power plants, promote clean coal technology, encourage development of wind and natural gas energy sources, and provide incetives for development of hybrids and alternate energy automotive engines.

Cleaning up Washington and increasing transparency and accountability of government are standard lines for both party, but McCain promised a roomful of Republicans that he would go after waste no matter which party was supporting the wasteful spending. He would veto the first pork barrel spending bill that came across his desk and he would name names to the American public. Shades of Ronald Reagan.

I wonder whether Sarah Palin will auction off Air Force 2 on eBay.

A zinger for both Republicans and Democrats by McCain: “Constant partisan rancor is not a solution, it’s a cause…it’s what happens when people go to Washington to work for themselves, not for you.”

McCain then recounted the story of his imprisonment and torture, and how it transformed him. “I wasn’t my own man anymore; I was my country’s.” For this segment of the speech, he shitcanned the teleprompter and spoke from the heart.

Finally, he gave the audience a rousing send-off, exhorting them to “Stand up! Stand up! Stand up and fight!”

It was clearly a speech that reached out for the undecided vote. How successful that outreach will be remains to be seen. Palin certainly improves his chances with the Independents and undecideds. But will they believe that McCain is a fighter who can change Washinton?

Unlike the splashy, outdoor finale by the Greek temple Democrats, the final moments here were the typical confetti and balloon drops, augmented by pre-recorded fireworks playing on the big screen that served as the backdrop for the podium. Nothing overly spectacular.

This tired Mouse will let the pollsters decide who bounced higher and suchlike. It is time for this campaign to begin in earnest, which means lots of commercials and phone calls. At least we won’t have to hear the annoyingly haughty, “I’m John Kerry and I approved this message.” Both Obama and McCain are more pleasing to the ear. (Thanks to John McCain and Russ Finegold, we still have to listen to that stupid drivel.) We’ll have stump speeches and debates. This Mouse will come out when he sniffs a story.

By the way, this horny mouse notes that the women were hotter at the Republican convention than at the Democratic convention. Just an observation, folks.

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Filed Under: General Tagged With: 2008 Presidential Election, Barack Obama, John McCain, Republican National Convention

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Whodat Turkey?

The Nittany Turkey is a retired techno-geek who thinks he knows something about Penn State football and everything else in the world. If there's a topic, we have an opinion on it, and you know what "they" say about opinions! Most of what is posted here involves a heavy dose of hip-shooting conjecture, but unlike some other blogs, we don't represent it as fact. Read More…

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