The Nittany Turkey

Primarily about Penn State football, this is a tale told by idiots, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

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Potheads Unite!

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On the marijuana front, two recent high-profile football oriented cases literally beg for the legalization of cannabis trafficking.

First, we have our old Nittany Lion whipping boy, running back Austin Scott, now 28, who while he was a player was accused of rape and kicked off the team, although charges were later dropped. He picked up the girl at a dance club and took her home and banged her, apparently, as it ultimately turned out, with absence of malice. The incident inspired what I believe to be one of the canniest on-line comments ever, as a reader quipped, “Austin always did like to dance around before hitting the hole.”

Well, that was then and this is now. Austin has traded his ball skills (no pun intended) for a career in merchandising. Alas, his dubious customer base created a minor impediment, as certain insincere customers did not fully appreciate the nature of the merchandise they purchased. Selling ganja to undercover police officers is a bad marketing move if you want to grow your business. Scott is now free on $10,000 bail.

That brings us to another argument for legalization of medical marijuana: Carl Pelini. Carl is the older brother of Bo Pelini, who is the beleaguered and probably short-time coach of the Nebraska Cornhuskers. Carl coaches Florida Atlantic University, a football program of somewhat lesser stature. Pelini has led the C-USA Owls to a 2-6 record this year, going nowhere with yet another program built by the legendary Howard Schnellenberger. Now, with four games to go, Pelini is bailing out.

Apparently, Pelini attended a party where some weed was passed around. Unfortunately, he was unaware of the seditious whistle blowers that would ultimately give him a whistle blowjob right out the door by ratting on him to FAU AD Pat Chun. Chun would not reveal the blowers. Nonetheless, with discretion being the better part of valor, Pelini resigned today.

Now, Bo knows an easy way out at Nebraska. He should go to a pot party and let the recreational drug do the honors. Better than being fired for being a lousy coach or for profanity-laden tirades.

I’ll be back later with a preview and prognostication for the much anticipated (not) Illinois game.

Bowman Humor

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Unless you’re totally oblivious as a PSU fan, you undoubtedly know that linebacker Navorro Bowman received another year of probation among other wrist slaps by the court when he admitted to having smoked some more pot during his initial probation period for an unrelated disorderly conduct charge.

Johnstown’s WJAC-TV reports on the subject:

Linebacker Navarro Bowman is already on probation for disorderly conduct, stemming from an on campus fight. Court sources tell WJAC that Bowman recently admitted to Centre County probation officials that he has smoked marijuana, at least twice, since December. Plus, Bowman has completed none of the 100 hours of community service that was ordered by the court. A hearing on his probation status is scheduled for this week.

Is that enough to land Bowman a spot in the proverbial Paterno doghouse? Apparently it is, as is evidenced by his absence from the annual blue-white scrimmage. The best quote on the subject comes from Todd Sponsler’s 50 Yard-Lion. Sponsler quipped as follows in his coverage of the spring game:

Sean Lee, Brent Carter, and Stephfon Green did not play while recovering from injuries. Navarro Bowman was also a bit bonged up and did not play.

The Gift That Keeps On Giving?

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Ed Johnson, former Nittany Lion and now starting defensive tackle for the NFL Indianapolis Colts, was arrested early Wednesday on a drug possession charge.

Ed’s Penn State screwups are still fresh in most of our minds. You’ll remember Ed from the sexual assualt episode back in 2005. He was reinstated in 2006, but didn’t play in the Outback bowl due to a violation of team rules.

This Turkey thought that Johnson would straighten out his act when he got the stint with the Colts and happened into the starting job when Booger McFarland went down. He was an undrafted free agent, who was lucky to find any interest in him by the NFL and even more fortuitous to get a starting job by happenstance. He has a very supportive coach in Tony Dungy, who is often referred to as a “players’ coach.” Dungy had a talk with Johnson when he was brought on board and thought they had reached an understanding about behavior issues. However, clearly, you can’t teach an old dog new tricks.

Ed had a fine year last year, starting all 16 games and recording 63 tackles, one sack, and one forced fumble. He won’t be playing this week for sure, according to Head Coach Tony Dungy, and his future is uncertain.

Johnson was stopped for speeding on I-465 north of Indianapolis. The cops subsequently charged him with both possession of illegal drugs and possession of marijuana. (This Turkey doesn’t know why there were two separate charges, but I guess there is a legal distinction in Indiana.)

“As in any other incident of this nature, it will be reviewed under the league’s substance abuse policy,” league spokesman Greg Aiello wrote in an e-mail to The Associated Press. “A player’s prior history can be considered in evaluating potential discipline under the program.”

This underscores what I’ve been saying about guys like Maurice Evans and Abe Koroma. First of all, not keeping their noses clean gets them the “character flag” on their NFL scouting report, which alerts teams to character issues and, in the worst case, keeps them undrafted. Then, later on, if they should happen to actually land an NFL job and get into even a minor jam, the league will look back at their college record and brand them as repeat offenders. This does not portend well for the health of their wallets.

Ed’s checkered past, along with the plethora of recent off-field incidents, could impact Penn State players trying to enter the NFL. I hope Penn State is not developing a reputation for producing tainted players, but the more incidents that come to light, the more NFL teams will shy away from Nittany Lions.

Time will tell whether Ed Johnson’s NFL career will survive this incident. If it does, he better reform his ass, or he’ll be gone for good.