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The Nittany Lions Speak Out

Posted on July 25, 2012 Written by The Nittany Turkey

The 2012 Nittany Lions

View this morning’s statement by the 2012-2013 Nittany Lions about their commitment to the University, the students, the alumni, and the fans.

Team Statement

Statement by Penn State Football Team: “This team is sticking together. We aren’t going anywhere. And we could not be more proud to be Penn Staters now. We look at this as a great opportunity to have the ability to bring back not only a team but an entire university. This team has taken on more adversity than any team has faced in history which is a testament to our commitment to our team’s character, our fans, and our university. One man didn’t build this program and one man sure as hell cannot tear it down. This program was built on the backs of the thousands of great men who put on the Penn State uniform. Today it is no different. No sanction or politician can tear this team apart. No one can take away what this university means to us. We will stick together and create our own legacy. Our loyalty lies only with our teammates, coaches, fans and families. No one else. It’s not going to be easy but we know that we have acquired the strength that we have overcome and we will embrace our anger and burn it as fuel this season. We can’t wait for September 1 and to be back in Beaver Stadium and playing for Penn State in front of the best fans in the nation. We ask everyone to come out, show the support, wear your colors proudly and show that adversity makes the Penn State nation tougher and stronger.”

 

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Filed Under: Penn State Football Tagged With: 2012, college football, Michael Mauti, Michael Zordich, Nittany Lions, Penn State

Past Due, Please Remit

Posted on April 4, 2012 Written by The Nittany Turkey

I found this hanging around with my old drafts from before my Nittany Turkey hiatus. It was never published. Although it might be passe, being dated February 9, I decided to publish it anyway for anal retentiality’s sake.

There are two definitions of “remit”. One is to make a payment; the other is to diminish or abate. These seemingly conflict with one another, but thinking about it, I conclude that by sending your remittance, you are causing the bill to be remitted. Therefore, you remit your remittance to achieve a remittance of the bill. What does this have to do with today’s post? Damned if I know.

All I know is that we’re overdue for an installment of Sudden Impact. This Turkey will now devote his unremitting efforts at rectumfying that deficit.

Jay Paterno writes a thank-you letter to Penn Staters in this week’s column.

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As his preliminary hearing looms on Friday, Jerry Sandusky’s counsel scrambles to construct his defense.

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Is a four team BCS playoff in the works? Tim Dahlberg of the AP thinks they’re spinning wheels, for now, anyway.

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Seven former PSU players will attend the NFL Combine.

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Ahhh, the off-season. What a bummer. No football until the spring games, and they’re not really football. It’s withdrawal time!

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Filed Under: Penn State Football Tagged With: BCS playoff, football, Nittany Lions, Penn State, Sandusky

Quick Smacks for a Pre-Bowl Friday

Posted on December 30, 2011 Written by The Nittany Turkey

Here’s a collection of recent snippets of information that found their way to my turkey coop.

So, who’s the latest of the rumored candidates under consideration for the open head coaching job at Penn State? No, not Jim Caldwell, who will probably be available after the Indianapolis Colts season ends. It’s none other than Eric Mangini, once the youngest coach in the NFL, who successfully compiled losing records at and managed to get fired by both the New York Jets and the Cleveland Browns. Mangini apparently hasn’t yet been contacted by the Dave Joyner’s search committee, but that doesn’t stop the media wonks from doing their macho posturing and playing the “See, I told you so” game.

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We imagine that Christina Aguilera is quaking in her patent leather go-go boots. A bill has been introduced in the Indiana legislature to impose “performance standards” for singing the Star Spangled Banner at public school and state university events. This Turkey thinks the bill is stupid — especially because it prescribes only a $25 fine; however, I agree with its intent. How often do you want to just kick the ass of some narcissistic singer who (to quote American Idol’s Randy Jackson) “makes that song their own” and embellishes it with notes that Frances Scott Key couldn’t have even dug out of his ass after drinking flaming Dr. Pepper Depth Charges all night long at the Ft. McHenry Inn. You know the ones I mean. Some of them think they’re more important than the words of the original song, so they don’t bother learning them. Right, Christina?

In Michigan, there’s a similar law that’s been on the books since 1931, and it makes mocking the national anthem a misdemeanor with more serious punishment than a lousy $25 fine.

How played—The national hymn or anthem, “The Star Spangled Banner”, shall not be played, sung or otherwise rendered in this state in any public place nor at any public entertainment, nor in any theatre, motion picture hall, restaurant or cafe, except as an entire and separate composition or number and without embellishments of national or other melodies; nor shall “The Star Spangled Banner” or any part thereof or selection from the same, be played as a part or selection of a medley of any kind; nor shall “The Star Spangled Banner” be played at or in any of the places mentioned herein for dancing or as an exit march.

I don’t think it is enforced, having heard some of the ridiculous renditions of our national anthem at Detroit Pistons games.

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I assume that you know by now that Rob Bolden has been named the starting quarterback for the forthcoming TicketCity.com Bowl. Well, you know now, one way or the other.

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Two tweets by former Nittany Lion and incoming New Jersey state legislator Adam Taliaferro cracked me up. The lad who showed extraordinary resilience and recovery capabilities in surmounting an injury that would have left most of us paralyzed has his moments with trivial irritations, as all of us do. Apparently, McDonald’s got ol’ Number 43 going on Friday night:

Adam Taliaferro: One sweet n sour for a 20pc nugget?!?!? I’m real mad at #McDonalds right now

NittanyTurkey: Sue the bastards!

Adam Taliaferro: @NittanyTurkey that’s a good idea…I need good lawyer though

NittanyTurkey: I think you can find one close by if he isn’t too involved in state politics

Adam Taliaferro: Whenever I order nuggets…there’s always that one nugget that doesn’t taste quite right #GivingUpNuggetsIn2012

NittanyTurkey: Sue the bastards LOL

I guess Adam would rather switch than fight.

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The way the “Nick Saban is coming to Penn State” rumor got started was stupidity bordering on journalistic irresponsibility by Michael Sedor of the Harrisburg Patriot-News. Although he is a bloggist with the paper, being affiliated with a respected source of news requires a little more vigilance over what one posts, as it will be lent much more credibility than the crap that I post here, for example. He re-posted a comment made on the blog from an anonymous poster with the apt pseudonym “loldaveyjones”, in which the poster asserted that he knew for a fact that Saban would be coming to Penn State because “someone in his family” contributed megabucks to Penn State and this top secret information came from the big spender. I guess Sedor thought it was a slow news day or maybe he wanted that thrill that the morons on Facebook get when they tell someone to re-post some annoying crap that sweeps the country because other morons re-post it. Well, take your lumps, Mike. For those who want to see this nonsense, check it out.

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The Nittany Lions in Dallas for the TicketCity.com bowl were treated to a Dallas Mavs game, which they viewed from fancy suites. Dallas wound up beating Toronto 99-86.

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Artificially Sweetened said she would help me rebuild the two giant lamps I scored from my mom’s estate. I just wanted to put that in writing so that she can’t worm her way out of it.


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Filed Under: Penn State Football Tagged With: Adam Taliaferro, Chicken McNuggets, college football, McDonalds, national anthem, Nick Saban, Nittany Lions, Penn State

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Whodat Turkey?

The Nittany Turkey is a retired techno-geek who thinks he knows something about Penn State football and everything else in the world. If there's a topic, we have an opinion on it, and you know what "they" say about opinions! Most of what is posted here involves a heavy dose of hip-shooting conjecture, but unlike some other blogs, we don't represent it as fact. Read More…

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