The Nittany Turkey

Primarily about Penn State football, this is a tale told by idiots, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

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Penn State: Winding it Up in 2015

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How will Penn State finish?

Carnac the MagnificentWe all sort of waffled at the season’s outset when I called for our annual predictions. Yes, it was too early, with a veritable plethora of unknowns to cloud the crystal ball at that point. However, now we’ve seen ten games, so we know a lot more. I’m asking you to tell me what you think will happen with Penn State’s remaining two games, plus your bowl prediction: site, opponent, and outcome. I’ll do the same.

I won’t be insulted if you choose not to play. The roller coaster has worn all our asses down, and indeed, some have given up on the Nittany Lions for the year. Moreover, the season-ending injury to Jordan Lucas will daunt some of those who were already discouraged by the team’s inconsistency. Some of you won’t have the time or patience to play my game with me. That’s cool, too. In any case, I’m really interested in your thoughts. [Read more…]

Pre-Season Picks from Our Panel (Updated)

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The Nittany Turkey Panel of Experts Pipes Up

Carnac the MagnificentGood day, Nittany Lions football fans! All the predictions for Penn State football 2015 are now in, with the late entry this evening from Toejam. Toejam, as well as I, lived in the Penn State East Residence Hall “E” (presently called McKean) back in 1964-5. We’ve both done well to  be around 50 years later, but I digress.  [Read more…]

On the cusp of August, let us pray…

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Penn State Football 2015 is Nigh

The pre-season college football coaches’ poll is out, so that means your favorite turkey needs to get his feathered ass in gear to begin his coverage of the 2015-2016 Penn State football season. I guess a good start would be to once again poll my faithful readers, all five of you — we lost Mom back in 2011 — to see how everyone views the season ahead. I’ll review last year’s results, too, just so you know how you made out, or to laugh at you — one or the other.

This is an anniversary season, just like every year, so it is my pleasure to tell you that I have been writing this blog since August 2004, although the Nittany Turkey had been in existence for at least ten years prior to that as a mailing list. I wish I had the archives from back then. I know I was as full of crap back then as I am now, but Penn State football has undergone some enormous transformations in my 20+ years of combined turkey prose. The highs (1994-5, 2005-6), the lows ([cue cello] The Dark Years), and so many in-between years that pissed us all off when we thought they would do better. We loved St. Joe when he brought us a Rose Bowl Championship in 1995 and an Orange Bowl Championship in 2006; we hated him when the team languished during the [cue cello] years and through all the in-between years, come what may. Who knows where the road would lead us? Only a fool would say. Well, this turkey fool did, and half the time I was wrong, but I had great fun along the way. [Read more…]